the alberton papers

Name:
Location: alberton, mt., United States

I am a retired steamfitter and vocational instructor, Current member, alberton town council, having served two terms previously, several years ago. Resident of alberton almost 28 years. I am fiscally conservative and socially progressive, a free thinker and an advocate of good, responsive, honest government.

Friday, March 31, 2006

The Alberton Papers #10
By Dick Darne 4-1-06
Q. What is the white stuff in chicken dung? (Ans. At bottom of page)
W hat is the definition of chicken $#!^. besides a product of a chicken, it has a couple other meanings. One is the equivalent of a "double dog dare" but not likely to be used in polite company. The other is used to describe cowardly actions. There have been quite a few of these, here lately. Most recently, the county health officer was seen , camera in tow, taking pictures of the mayor’s cars. Will the informant please step forward? Another is the removal of the Alberton Papers from the post office. The postmistress said she did not do it. Will the chicken$#!^ please step forward? Mayor Joe was duly elected with not only a majority of the vote, but about a 2-1 margin, which not only makes him the winner with at least a modicum of a mandate, but the vote certainly was a repudiation of the previous mayor and her policies and her minions. I was also duly elected, most people have known my positions on issues have essentially remained the same for many, many years. At present I am thoroughly outvoted, and may not be able to stop the march of folly, but I will do the best I can with what I have to work with. I will continue to keep you informed thru the alberton papers of happenings and chicken$#!^ sightings. Please report any sightings and I will publish them. Wake up sheeple.
Dick Darne paper available@ http://albpap.blogspot.com/ Contact: aldermandarne@hotmail.com 722-4575

Thursday, March 30, 2006

The Alberton Papers # 9
By Dick Darne 3-26-06
In this paper we will return to #3 and discuss water/ sewer rates. As I said before, state law requires that "enterprise funds" must stand alone, and in the case of the sewer, revenues must exceed expenditures by 10% as conditions of the grants and loans. This is not a bad thing, back in 1968, we installed a nice new sewer treatment plant and the town fathers calculated that a total monthly charge of six dollars would cover the loan and costs (no reserve fund).they then said "well we wont have to worry about this in our lifetime". This proved to be true. When the system needed replacing, there was no money set aside, and they were all gone to the great town meeting in the sky. Unfortunately when there is no money, then it is necessary to beg and borrow, stealing being impractical and illegal, placing the town at the mercy of the grantors, lenders, and bureaucratic regulators. When the smoke clears, you not only have debt, but you are now subject to lots of "shalls" which are distinct from optional "should’s and ought-to’s . Extrapolating from the auditor’s report, the deficiency in the sewer revenues is $8996, = about $750 per month= (lets use 150 customers) =$5 increase per household (approx.) Looming on the horizon is a water system upgrade (rough est $2 million). Superior is looking at about $1.2 million and a rate increase of about $4.50. Assuming the same degree of granting for us as Superior, we would be looking at about $7.50 increase. Not even allowing for inflation, we could be looking at $12 more in rates in a couple years. This paper is not to pass judgement on whether we should raise rates, that decision ,in a great part, is not even ours to make. What to do?
As stated in the audit,"the town needs to increase sewer rates or reduce operating costs". Reducing costs is a good start. Maybe reducing other expenses with an offsetting tax reduction. Reexamine the maximum water rate currently capped at $80. Any consumption beyond what is needed for household use is more luxury than necessity. On the other hand, during the times (9 months or more) that there is excess water running from the storage overflow, why should we pay a premium? Most of us have wasted water at some time or another. How do our rates compare to other towns? Exactly how much would we save on insurance with upgraded water mains and fire hydrants? Maybe we could build a "doggie park for tourists", tourism would increase and sales of dog food would soar, increasing profits for the store, which would expand, causing a greater taxable value, increasing revenue with accompanying rise in employment, causing ever spiraling prosperity and forever solving our economic woes ad nauseam. Or we can halt the "march of folly", reduce spending and realize that this is where we live, not a tourist mecca. This is a time for good ideas, and don’t forget to ask questions. The best is yet to come.
Dick Darne. #1- #8 reprints available. 722-4575
aldermandarne@hotmail.com
box 246 alberton
criticism or literary contributions welcome
differing viewpoints also welcome

The Alberton Papers #8
By Dick Darne 3-16-06
old dogs, junk cars and watermelon kool-aid. Not quite the same as Tom T. Hall’s song, but it’ll do. Dogs first. Judging by the number of dogs in town, there obviously is a lot of dog lovers who live here. Most are responsible, some are lacking and a few are totally oblivious to their dog’s shenanigans. Dogs do what dogs do. They eat, sleep, play and poop. If they do this somewhere besides their own yard, then it is a matter of manners, (the owner’s not the dog). Bad manners is not a capital offense, but it can result in one being vilified by his neighbors. Now three are all kinds of dogs, some dangerous, some harmless, size not being a major factor. I number among my friends, several huge, lovable klutzes. (We’re talking dogs here.) So, I guess we might conclude that not all alleged dog offenses are equal. Let’s move to junk cars for a moment.
A perceived "junk car offense" may be a real life threat to life, liberty or pursuit of happiness, but it could be just as easily an economic necessity, keeping a rig running to get to one’s job (or jobs). Mostly it’s somewhere in between. One man’s trash is another man’s treasure. Wht is the difference between an alleged ugly old junk car and an ugly old junk car with tags? Or trucks, (not covered under the "junk car laws"), tractors, old railroad stuff or little gnomes scattered all around a dirtless yard. Beauty or ugliness is in the eye of the beholder. We might also say that not all junk car offfenses are equal.
So, what to do? The "gestapo" method, where we have neighbors spying and informing on each other, the SS with spy cameras poking and prodding, night court, (few, if any convictions). Your tax dollars at work, while real criminals laugh. I think it’s safe to say this method is not wanted in Alberton. Somewhere along the line we lost our community based law enforcement. We could try this: first one on one, dog owner (pooper) and yard owner (poopee).
Poopee: "Your #$^^*$!@* dog pooped in my yard, clean it up you %$^^*@~#$**!"
Pooper: "You @$#&*% clean it up yourself, my dog didn’t do it, that %$#@&** other dog did it!"
Poopee: "You #$%^#@ clean it up now or slap leather you lilly livered *&%$#@!"
Pooper: "All right, you &^$#@*#..."
All right, I made that up. The point is, this is America, we all have the right to confront our accuser. If thine neighbor’s eyesore offends thee, ask him, sign the complaint, or grin and bear it. Just say NO to the gestapo.
For copies, comments or death threats: 722-4575 or aldermandarne@hotmail.com
This essay is intended to provoke thought, not much offense intended.
Other viewpoints invited. DD

Wednesday, March 29, 2006

THE ALBERTON PAPERS #7
By Dick Darne 3-14-06
"It shouldn’t cost a million to put up a pavillion" D. Darne
"Can’t anybody here play this game" Casey Stengel
Facts we know, according to the available information at this time:
1)a genuine architect drew up plans for a nice gazebo
2)community development block grant (federal money) gave us funds to help pay for materials to build gazebo
3)materials were purchased and concrete poured to the tune of over $7000
4)expensive glue lams were left directly on the ground, sinking well into ground
5)while concrete was troweled nicely, the specified post anchors were not installed
6)while the inventory of glu- lams match the invoice, some are not the correct length 7)the post anchor problem can be corrected, at the direction of the architect, by custom fabricating & properly anchoring post anchors 8) the purchase of additional materials will be necessary, both missing and any weather damaged beams
9)a "consortium" of local talent is needed to decide on a course of action, be it volunteer or contractor, someone needs to be in charge
10) all liability & safety matters must be considered
11)compliance with CDBG is necessary to prevent future problems with grants or having this one pulled.
We have a pile of lemons. Can we make lemonade? Whom to blame? See #5 we were asleep at the wheel.
"We have met the enemy and he is us" Walt Kelly (pogo)
" The road to hell is paved with good intentions" St Bernard of Clairvaux
to make lemonade, contact me: Dick Darne 722-4575 aldermandarne@hotmail.com
P.s. I’ll be gone to portland next week to visit granddaughter, see joe

The Alberton Papers #6 by Dick Darne
Do not forget that every people deserves the regime it is willing to endure!"
Leaflet of The White Rose SocietyMunich, Germany, 1943
A skunk is still a skunk even if his tail happens to be pointed away from you for a while.
Steven C. Day, author,
"Last Chance Democracy Café’
Today’s topic is about things that smell. Of course not everything literally smells, like a real skunk. I once was on the receiving end of a "polecat". Aside from being socially unacceptable for a while, there was no lasting damage. Other things that smell in the figurative sense usually occur during social intercourse. Shady dealings by public officials from the highest levels of our federal government right down the "good old boy network" in Podunk Corners, Anywhere, USA
Some strange aromas emanating from the epicenter of Alberton, suspicious happenings, overshadowing overt acts. Here in Alberton, an official, genuine muckity muck from the United States of America Census Bureau, (yes that’s right, the guys who count everybody every ten years, last in 2000, next in 2010, this is 2006), shows up to count Mayor Joe Hanson and verify that he lives here. He was here when I arrived in 1979 , 3 censuses (or is that censii) ago. I know Joe is regionally famous and wildly popular, but I didn’t know they knew him back in D.C. I can’t imagine why anyone would call in the cenS.S.us bureau, can you? Another event that probes the threshold of the smell test is the "employee of the employee of the employee. Now while it was proven conclusively in a song that it is possible for one to be ones own grandpaw, lets look at this carefully. Our clerk is our employee. One who works for the clerk is her employee, who is a council member, who advocated and voted to spend public funds to send her to clerks school. Maybe she will get sent to coffee school. Maybe I’m getting senile, but my sense of smell still detects an odor. At the least, IT JUST DON"T LOOK GOOD! Loyalties have their place, as a public servant, the public comes first. Even if the act is the right thing to do, if it doesn’t look good, don’t do it. Some final thoughts: Things that have only a mildly unpleasant redolence have a way of sneaking up on you, akin to boiling a frog. Work expands to fill the time available. If you let it be known how much you have to spend, guess how much the bill will be. If you keep doing the same thing over and over and keep expecting a different outcome, then that is insanity. Dick Darne Copies of all alberton papers available by e-mail:
aldermandarne@hotmail.com 722-4575 3-10-06

The Alberton papers #5 by Dick Darne
Before the bobcat, lets discuss "blame", not to be confused with "the blame game". Blame is a tool, no better or worse than the use to which it is put. For example, suppose a boiler blows up. Certainly someone will be blamed. Now if the blame is correctly placed, and the main objective is to never have this happen again, we have two options: fire the person responsible and certainly he won’t blow up this boiler again,( but his successor might), or; reinstate the person because he definitely knows from first hand experience what can happen, and the odds are it will never happen again on his watch. That being said, lets move to the bobcat.
From all available information, it appears we have purchased $49,673 worth of bobcat and attachments. The price miraculously is just under the $50000 limit for competitive bidding. Even though our town is rife with accumulated knowledge and experience in the fields of snow removal, digging, and equipment operation, amazingly, none of these people were consulted. While it appears the snow blade works, do we know if all the attachments are suitable for our needs? There are two in particular that, in my opinion , are worthless for our needs. We already have mowers capable of cutting all the town’s grass. Outside of the park , I have personally cut 95% of the grass, the remainder being on a very steep slope. Why do we have the brush cutter?
As for the power sweeper, the state does RR ave. and has always done our parking lot. We have no other paved streets. In addition, I and others who have used one can attest to the huge dust cloud kicked up if copious quantities of water are not used. So, what do we do with them?
It sure looks like someone showed poor judgement. Was it whoever sent a town employee out to spend up to $50000 and use his own assessment of what to buy? Or the employee himself? Or the equipment salesman? Isn’t it true that if the salesman knows how much you have to spend, he will try to sell that much? There are a lot of people involved, is there some connection? Friends? Relatives? Business connections? Did anyone involved benefit in any way?
From the time we were children, we are conditioned to think "the blame goes downward", but much later in life, if minds are kept open and observant, we learn that most of the time the blame belongs up. While everything discussed here may meet the letter of the law, it just doesn’t look good. Final thought: if the blame belongs up, then since,"we the people" govern, we were asleep at the wheel. "The price of liberty is eternal vigilance" means vigilance in all matters, large and small, top right down to the absolute rock bottom grass roots.
Dick Darne
aldermandarne@hotmail.com
722-4575

The Alberton papers #3 by Dick Darne 3-2-06
The following content is my own opinions, based on information available at this time. As always, one’s opinions can change as more information is brought to light. Today’s topic is: water/sewer rate increases. The W/S are "enterprise funds" and must "stand alone", that is, all revenues must go to the fund and all expenditures must come from the fund. Further as conditions of the loans and grants, the revenues must cover all operating costs plus enough to build a reserve fund. Or, simply: the gozinta must exceed the gozouta by about 10%. I have reviewed the minutes for the last few years and could find no discussion of finding ways to cut costs associated with operating the system. There certainly seems to be a great potential for savings in the electricity consumption. For this month alone, out of a total bill of $1790, $1197 was for W/S operation, $744 alone just to aerate the lagoons. $125 for electricity in the well house with the pump OFF for several months. The size of the electric bill alone should cause concern..The entire operation should be reviewed to find ways to cut costs. It’s real easy for a " circuit rider like Harry Whalen to ride into town and declare "RAISE YOUR RATES" (I’ve never heard him say "lower your rates"). More food for thought: while it’s true that some of the pipes in the ground are very old ,and have exceeded their useful life, grantsdo not cover all the costs of upgrading a water system. To replace them could cause a substantial increase in rates. While we are on this topic, let’s add some comments about the "water study update" Even with a grant, half of the $22,000 comes out of our pockets. This is to update an approx. 4 year old plan. Not much has changed, old pipes are 4 years older. A few more houses (new pipe). Only a few more building sites left. Does it cost $22K to update a recent plan? I don’t have all the answers, but if we don’t take care of this, someone else will. Awaiting comments: 722-4575 E-mail= aldermandarne@hotmail.com The Alberton papers #4 by Dick Darne
So it’s not all "doom & gloom", let’s explore something positive. Instead of thinking of ways to build community by spending money, lets think of ways that we all do (without realizing)from time to time. Turn off your TV. Leave your house. Know your neighbors. Look up when you are walking. Greet people. Sit on your stoop. Plant flowers. USE YOUR LIBRARY. Play together. Buy from local merchants. Share what you have. Help a lost dog. Take children to the park. GARDEN TOGETHER. Support neighborhood schools. FIX IT EVEN IF YOU DIDN’T BREAK IT. Have pot lucks. HONOR ELDERS. Pick up litter. Read stories aloud. DANCE IN THE STREET. Talk to the mail carrier. Listen to the birds. Put up a swing. HELP CARRY SOMETHING HEAVY. Barter for your goods. Start a tradition. ASK A QUESTION. HIRE YOUNG PEOPLE FOR ODD JOBS. Organize a block party. BAKE EXTRA AND SHARE. Ask for help when you need it. Open your shades. Sing together. SHARE YOUR SKILLS. Take back the night. Turn up the music. Turn down the music. Remember, these are things that are free for the using and pay big dividends. 3-2-06 dick. 722-4575 E-mail= aldermandarne@hotmail.com

Sunday, March 26, 2006

alberton papers #1 & #2

Alberton papers #1 by Dick Darne 2-21-06 As your newly elected council member, I would like to thank all my supporters and invite ALL citizens to participate in making government work, right here at absolute grass roots level. An informed citizenry is every bit as important as your elected officials. My oath was to protect and defend the U.S. and Montana constitutions and laws, obey the laws and faithfully execute my duties. I take an oath very seriously. I also take this to mean that on behalf of my fellow citizens, I must ask questions about any actions taken by our town officials and employees, especially the expenditure of our tax dollars. Hopefully we can be better informed before the monthly meetings. I have an E-mail address:aldermandarne@hotmail.com . Phone: 722-4575. Mail = box 246 st. = 311 parkway. More in next paper. Lets communicate, your councilman, Dick Alberton papers # 2 by Dick Darne 2-22-06 There appear to be several areas of concern. In this paper I will list a few for thought and report on them one at a time in the succeeding papers. I will update as information becomes available 1) Possible W/S rate increases. 2) Bobcat purchase with some attachments of dubious value. 3)The gazebo problem and how to salvage it. 4) The town maintenance position that I have not seen any evidence to support. There is more, I am awaiting more information, and comments. Dick aldermandarne@hotmail.com 722-4575